Anal Wink Football League
Collusion & Blackout Drunk Drafting Encouraged.
Week 2 Rankings
Your Week 2 Rankings Were Inspired By Five Thirty Eight’s NFL ELO Rankings.
Each team received a carefully calculated Bates Score. Your Bates Score was generated with a proprietary algorithm that nobody has access to, including Bates.
Enjoy Knuckleheads
#12 – Old Balls
You’ve been here before. (Last year actually after David Johnson’s untimely injury). Keep an eye on the old sly fox. He’ll make a run.
#11 – Thomas
On Paper Your Team Has Talent. Watch out for Sleeper-Keeper Aaron Jones fresh off suspension. He could really help out in your
re-building year 😉
#10 – Seabass
Your rank would be higher if you would start that stud QB crushing it on your bench.
#9 – Dr Dave
Your week 1 high score has skewed your current ranking…
#8 – Kendall (sp?)
I can’t get a read on him. I still think he is an AI bot learning our language and draft/waiver habits and will soon run this league.
A word of advice, you’re starting to get a little desperate with your excessive tight end bids. Adjust your code.
#7 – Samir
Whoops, sorry, this was your ranking with Le’Veon.
Need to adjust this later….
#6 – Georgie
Hmm…team seems a bit stale. Needs some more WR, huh?
Great John Brown pick up bro. You must have an eye for undervalued WRs
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#5 – Bates
Woah, I don’t know what happened at the draft…
Draft dollars? I don’t need no stinking draft dollars. fuggem.
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4 – Ebby
This is a courtesy ranking for your two rings. I gave you so much fucking draft money for Tyreek and you wasted it on Shady McCoy (worst O-Line in football) and fragile Dalvin Cook??
3- Dan The man
(I need to find the original picture.)
Bates’ crazy prediction – Chris Thompson finishes as Top 20 Back
(Heck, inches into top 15, if he stays healthy)
2- Boudreau
You’re still the House Favorite…for now.
Todd Gurley and Nuk–whoever or whatever that is–should form the basis of another deep run.